Remembering people of the past

I am going to take a different approach for the next few days. I am going to change my music to remember people who were near and dear to me in the past who aren't here any longer. I think of these people often and miss them.

Kristen
I first meet Kristen in grade school. We weren't best friends she already had one and so did I. We went to a private Catholic school together from Kindergarten through 8th grade. I loved staying at Kristen's house over night. We got to do fun things and her parents were never around. As years went by Kristen and I got closer. Kristen was beautiful and she made you feel beautiful just being around her. By the time we got in Junior High she was interested in boys and it would take her 2 hours to get ready for anything. She was obsessed with her looks. She was to put it bluntly vain. She came from the wrong side of the tracks she wasn't from a rich or well known family. She was working her own jobs from the time she was 12. She was the mother to her 3 younger siblings from the time she was 8. She sacrificed a lot to take care of her younger siblings. When she turned 16 her mom bought her a car, but soon after she had bought her own car. A little red metro convertible. We had such fun riding in that small little red car. She had a management position in a restaurant in town by the time she was 17. She had good grades and participated in dance. She always seemed to find time for her friends. Of course we all drifted our different ways during high school because of different interests and loves. She was engaged to at least 3 different guys before she married her husband. Even as we drifted apart we were never far from each other. She would call and need cheering up because of a break up of I may just want to talk. It was at Kristen's house my senior year on lunch break that I found out I was pregnant with Corrisa. She made me go to her house every day for lunch after that so she could make sure I was eating healthy. She threw my baby shower for me and was Corrisa's first daycare provider when I went back to work after I had her. She was always a great support. I could tell her anything and know she wouldn't judge me. When I meet Mark, her and her husband watched the kids for me so I could go on a date. She was the only one of my friends I invited to my wedding. When she sat in the hospital with preeclampsia for weeks before she had her first I would go up as often I as I could after work and talk with her. She definitely appreciated the chatter time. Whenever I would get pregnant she was always the first person I would call and tell. She never asked me when we would be done or how many more we were going to have. She was always as excited as she would have been for her own pregnancy. Her and Scott had problems conceiving their second and Mark and I had 1 together before she was able to conceive. She conceived baby number 2 shortly before we conceived baby 2. We went to the same clinic and so we would catch up while waiting to see the doctor. She had her son in December and I had mine in March. A few days before I had Gabriel I was delivering Girl Scout cookies to her house. We lived 2 hours away from where she lived and she lived out in the country. I had left Corrisa, Briley, and Miles out in the van while I ran the cookies in. While in the house my cell had rang so Corrisa brought in the phone and Briley had broke something in the van and followed suit. When Briley got out he locked the van and so Miles was locked in the van in his car seat. I couldn't find a locksmith and was hysterical. Kristen and Scott were great. They helped and we eventually found a locksmith. Mark showed up at the same time. He sped about 90 mph to get there with the extra keys. Shortly before Kristen's son's first birthday she was diagnosed with breast cancer. You see, Kristen lived in a tanning bed. She thought that was the best place to relax and unwind. She had developed a sore on her breast shortly after her son was born and she would pick at it. It kept getting worse and when she finally went to the doctor the cancer had gotten into her breast tissue. She was 26 when she had her breasts removed. She was so upset and felt less a woman. She was determined to get her size D's back and when they gave her her implants she settled for a C. She was happy. She didn't require treatment. She was living her life. She went back to school. Her and Scott were going to try for number 3 when she made it to the 1 year mark of being cancer free. She didn't make. She was teaching aerobics at a center in Ames and she hurt her back. She went to the doctor thinking it no big deal. It was. She had cancer again. She had it in her bones, liver, and lungs and later her brain. She was only 27 and told she had a year to live. She lived that year and 2 more after. She fought like crazy to see her babies grow up. She never had a negative attitude. She never slowed down. I only saw Kristen 2 times after she was diagnosed with cancer. I wished I could have seen her more, but her family needed the time they could get. She had a habit of putting her friends first. Every time poor Scott planned a night alone a friend would stop by and then it became a group thing. I didn't want to be like everybody else. Her family needed memories of just them. We talked on the phone plenty and I sent a card every week to encourage her. I was the first person she told that she only had 3 months to live. I cried. I loved her. She was the only one who loved me for who I was. She lived exactly 3 months from the phone call. I got the call shortly after I found out I was pregnant with Markus. It was the saddest funeral I ever attended. I went to the visitation, but never went up front to see her. I wanted to remember her for the beautiful young lady she was, not the shell of a body laying in a casket. I still remember sitting with old classmates remembering the old days when Scott came in carrying their 3 year old son. "Dad, now can I go see Mommy?" I thought I would die. Scott had a look of hopelessness on his face as he carried his son up to see his mommy. I looked at all the pictures and cried. They had an album made after she had had breast cancer. the photographer did a beautiful job. I have never seen anything like it. It was printed like a book. The pictures were printed right on the pages and Kristen or Scott had scripted letters to each other and each of the kids. It was beautiful. The photographer didn't set up the pictures they just happened. It was like watching a movie because the family was just enjoying a picnic, a walk, or just private conversation and nothing was posed. The next day I went and buried Kristen. Her daughter refused to leave the grave site because she wanted her mom. I was heartbroken. I didn't stay at the dinner after, but gave Scott a hug. It was the last time I have spoken to him or seen him. I haven't been able to send cards or pictures like I used to. I never know if he wants us to bug him and the kids. I know he has moved on and maybe married. Am I mad. No. Kristen had been preparing her children for a step-mom from the day she found out she would leave them. I talked with Kristen in my dream recently. I couldn't see her face, but it was her voice talking to me. I usually think about her a couple times a year. Certain songs. A small little red car. A trip to Hardees. A new pregnancy I can never share because she isn't there to get excited for me. I look back at old pictures of when we were young and remember a person from the past who helped make me who I was today.